Thursday, September 28, 2006

Dear God,

I was empty. I wandered the sterile, empty halls of my heart and I could not find God. Try as I may God was nowhere to be found. I felt panicky as if this was all there was to life, no central control, no building where God was housed. And so I wandered. Afraid.

And then a startling thing happened. A grandmother entered my picture, carrying concrete and buckets of water. She poured a foundation, a waiting place for God. And just as the groundwork was laid, another person appeared carrying lumber, a hammer and nails. I heard holy pounding. The wood came together and I could see walls beginning to form. I could see that something great was about to take place. And before I knew it there were others who came to help raise the walls upon the foundation. They stuck around to build a roof, an open roof, a roof that opened to the heavens. It was then I heard the sound of trumpets, a great chair was carried in and placed at the center. And then God came. God had not only provided His own home in my heart; he had called others to do it for him, and ultimately for me.

The sweetness of the grace afforded me stirs me in the depths of my being. I have this home where I can travel and find God at any second. And my friends, spiritual friends and family helped build this home for God, a permanent residence in my soul.

Yesterday some special friends held a surprise birthday party for me. There was great food, so much laughter we could have rolled in the aisles numerous times, presents and and so much more. Through their love I realize how God has brought people into my life along the way, carriers of God's agape, builders of God's home within me. I have a sacred home because God put sacred souls in my life.

My 60th birthday was a day of reflection, of my giftedness, of the blessedness of my relationship with God. I wandered the halls of my soul and counted my blessings, so many, so very many. When someone tried to say I was 27 and holding, I reminded them that I was 60. My age is an indication of the years God has been in my life. I may not have always known the Master was close by but the years of wisdom tell me that God has always resided within me. I just was unaware.

And so my house is full, of love for the gardener of my soul, for my spiritual companions, for the family I was born into and the family that forms each day. A wonder!

Holy deliverer,
you are the true center of my soul.
I have a home,
a spiritual home
erected by your friends
and mine.
I see the holy presence.
I smell the sweet scent of joy
and I know that Love abides.
I overflow with gratitude.

Always, Andrea