Thursday, October 12, 2006

Loving God,

"Lamb of God, you take away the sins of the world, have mercy on us." The chant is repeated three times, the last phrase, "grant us peace." For nearly twenty years I have echoed these words at the Carmelite Monastery during the Eucharist. But the impact of the words struck me yesterday as I uttered them. "Lamb of God, you take away the sins of the world..." I saw the war raging in Iraq. "Lamb of God, you take away the sins of the world..." I envisioned knife fights and smoking guns in the streets of Indianapolis. "Lamb of God, you take away the sins of the world..." I detected abused children's cries.

"Lamb of God, you take away the sins of the world..." A prayer, a plea, a lament for God to act. I was wailing in my spirit, groaning for God to change us, transforming our way of being toward one another, regenerating us, reformulating us with a new code. I felt fear and sorrow together, a world unsettled, people being destroyed in the most heinous ways. "Lamb of God, you take away the sins of the world."

Then suddenly a time warp set me down at the foot of the cross. I heard the mystery words. "Father, forgive them for they know not what they do." Jesus' own cry to take away our sins. What will it take, what price to rub out our sins, erasing them forever? Will we turn around in time to avoid another great war? Lines are being drawn between nations; government leaders are aligning themselves with others. Are we banding together for war? "Lamb of God, you take away the sins of the world..."

The bread was offered, small round papery discs on a blue pottery plate, "the body of Christ," Sister Jean Alice whispered to me. I picked one up, holding it in my hand as I turned to my covenant brother, "the bread of life, Bill." I heard the howling voices begin to quiet. "Lamb of God, you take away..."

My sins,
are they gone by your generous act?
Or are they dulled
in my senses
until I decide to sin again?
I do not carry a gun at my side,
nor have I concealed a knife,
but my words,
my attitudes and actions
can destroy,
have destroyed.
I have the power to destroy,
there I've said it,
I have the power to destroy.
"Lamb of God,
you take away the sins..."
even mine.
Those extraordinary eyes
look down at me,
a man broken and bleeding,
"Father, forgive..."
"Grant us peace."

I owe you everything, Andrea