Thursday, May 8, 2008

Dear God,

When I walked in the door, her daughters were waiting for me. I spoke to them and started to ask where Mary was. But then I was drawn to pretty blue flowers on a white couch. For a moment I was startled. Mary had blended into the couch.

I walked to the couch, sat down, and put my arm around her. Her head was bent as she rested on a couch pillow. I ran my finger across the top of her hand. "Hi, Mary." I spoke ever so quietly. "Hi." She said without opening her eyes.

She remained in her position as I whispered to her. "How are you doing?" I asked knowing she had just been put in hospice care. "Okay." She told me.

Mary is 90. We have a special relationship because she tells me I look and act so much like her mother Anna Cole. I get in trouble when I inadvertently say Anna Nicole. A real character, when she says something silly, I always tell her I could ground her and send her to her room. She laughs.

After about 15 minutes Mary sat up and we had a wonderful conversation. She admired my pink suede jacket. Although she is about a size 4, I told her she could borrow it any time. Then she got up, along with her oxygen tube, took my hand and walked me to the closet. "You can borrow my gray, black or purple suede jacket any time." She offered. "I will look fabulous." I said laughing.

We finally sat back down and she pulled out a birthday bag. "What color is your kitchen?" She asked. "Blue." (I was thinking of the one in Maine) She put together a scrungie, a hand-knitted dish cloth and a pretty blue dish towel. "Here, these are for you." She said as she handed me the gift. "Mary, I came to visit you, not come to get a gift."

As I sat on the floor at her feet listening to her talk, I realized Mary is worn out. The years have been good to her. She has lived well. But at 90 her body is failing her.

I brought up the subject we have talked most about. Mary wants to join the church before she dies. She has been waiting for a member of her family to join with her. But the person is not ready. Mary is.

I told her she could join the church at home in her jammies. "I'll even sing your favorite song." I told her. She smiled so big. I plan to return the first of the week for the special event, perhaps even a homecoming.

I love Mary,
dear God.
You have drawn
us together
in a tight circle
of love.
I am
so very blessed.

Love, Andrea