Tuesday, June 29, 2010

My dearest God,

I awakened this morning to a cool, beautiful, blue sky and white billowy cloud day. As I lay in bed, the sun rising to my right, I found myself saying, "I am lying here next to my husband in our home in Maine because you changed me and my world."

I believe that you always have your best interest in us as human beings. I believe you care for each person individually. I believe we are equally related to you, not some far and some close. I believe you tend to each one regardless of status, background, condition or anything else that may seem a barrier to access. I believe my circumstances changed because you were leading me.

As I prayed, my husband stirred and I leaned over to kiss him.

You, O God,
are supreme
among all gods.
You are
the one
and only God
of humanity.
I give thanks
and offer
my life
to you
as a testimony
to my gratitude.

Love, Andrea

Monday, June 28, 2010

Dear God,

Thank you for creating the ability to laugh! Something happens deep inside when I laugh and laugh really hard. Doors open in my soul, releasing all kinds of clutter and debris. A good laugh can cleanse me from within making me feel light, not bogged down.

This afternoon I talked with my middle daughter about her trip home with my two granddaughters. It all started when they were delayed at the airport. From there it spiraled downward but the story was so funny that by the time she had finished I had laughed so hard that tears spilled down my face.

I realize that not everyone can laugh. Some people are pushed down by life. By their own circumstances they cannot give themselves to letting go, falling back and tripping the start button on laughter. Yet, when it is possible things change inside. It feels like help is on the way. Even if we just laugh at ourselves, we can alter our emotions and change our situation.

As I laughed when my daughter unpacked her extremely funny story, I felt good. I was sorry she had had such an unbelievable experience but what a story it made. I thought to myself later what a gift laughter is. The gift went on and on as I shared it with my husband. In fact I laughed so hard I could hardly get the words out.

I love
to laugh,
Great God.
You give
wonderful opportunities
for laughter.
I know
life can bring
very difficult moments
but I
also know
that finding
a reason
to laugh
can send
some of
the pain packing.
Thanks!
And by
the way,
I love
the picture
of you laughing.

Love, Andrea

Sunday, June 27, 2010

My dearest God,

I have always believed that everything good comes from you. Today I said goodbye to my daughter and granddaughters. It was time to fly back home. Gabrielle and Sophie stayed for eleven days. Every day was good. We took turns saying our prayers at mealtime and bedtime. I stopped whatever I was doing when each one got up in the morning and I held them on my lap for a few minutes. It was a grand time making memories. I took lots of pictures.

Thank you,
Loving God,
for our
special time together.
Thank you
for providing
so well
for us.
We are
grateful for
riding bikes,
flying kites,
going to the movies,
attending a play,
attending two different churches,
frolicking in the ocean,
building a sand village,
seeing two lighthouses,
eating Brown's ice cream,
shopping at the port,
wearing funny hats,
sleeping overnight in a tent,
creating bracelets,
making bath salts,
watching movies at home,
eating ice cream at DQ,
going to two libraries,
doing the sand dance,
finding heartstones and seaglass,
preparing fruit kabobs and scrambled eggs,
hiking at the monastery,
buying Maine tee shirts,
making up new "biggie basket" voices,
singing Sound of Music songs,
making up a drama,
watching Chip and Chatter, the chipmunks in our yard,
telling funny family stories,
experiencing the exploding spills on all five of us,
and laughing a lot.

Gratefully, Andrea

Saturday, June 26, 2010

Dear God,

Last night we went to a barn to watch a production of Cinderella that was probably not the best production we have ever seen but the actors gave us a good evening of fun. There we were, my husband, daughter, two grandchildren and myself. As the play unfolded, periodically I would look to my right to see profiles of my granddaughters as they giggled and laughed at the characters and each other. I viewed my daughter as she chortled during the silly scenes with the amusing stepsisters. And then I turned to my left to watch my husband as his hands silently conducted the music that accompanied the comedy. Aware of our funny family, I swiftly turned once again to my two little girls who chuckled as they watched their grandfather. Inside myself I reveled in the moment recognizing what and who I have in my life.

There are those prized, treasured, priceless moments that occur each day touching my soul. I want to memorial them, frame them, and then hang them up for eternity. I want to replay the experience and relive the joy they give. I want to train my heart to bless others with that same kind of joy, the joy you alone offer.

O God,
creator of
all that
is good,
I wander
in the halls
of happy memories.
Moving from
room to room,
I count
the infinite number
of blessings
you have
given me.
I smile
praying that
the expression
on my face
conveys my appreciation
and love.

To you alone, Andrea

Friday, June 25, 2010

Dearest God,

I have not forgotten you! I may go two or three days without writing but my pursuit of your presence never stops.

During my clergy renewal leave I searched for you all day long. I looked in every direction anticipating your appearance. In the early morning darkness even before the light of day I searched for signs of your habitation through windows in airplanes, monasteries and hotel rooms in New Mexico, France, Italy, Ghana, England, Maine and the skies. I listened for sounds of you as I opened those same windows awaiting your voice to speak. I looked toward heaven and scanned the grounds excited to meet you before dawn. I was never disappointed.

You have made me aware, thoughtful of the sacred divine. You have put inside me a homing device working constantly to find you. So many times daily I hear it sound off causing me to turn and there in expected and unexpected ways I see your glorious presence reminding me that life is never dull or mundane. It is never dreadful or empty. It is never without beauty or goodness because you are in it all. Hallelujah!

Finding you
is my
heart's greatest joy.
Why would
I want
a life
without you?
It is you,
O Creator,
who gives color
to every picture.
It is you
who makes music
with the notes.
It is you
who provides taste
to the
earth's offerings.
It is you
who shapes touch
to be
a sublime moment.
And finally
it is you
who dispenses fragrance
and spice
to life.
Indeed,
how could I
ever forget you?

Love, Andrea

Thursday, June 24, 2010

My dearest God,

It was after 1:00 a.m. when I heard the sound of car doors slamming. I knew what that meant. I lifted my covers and shot downstairs. The first sight of my daughter warmed my heart. We live just five minutes from each other and we've been apart for several weeks this summer. I got to the door just in time to welcome her inside. We hugged as I gave thanks for her safe arrival.

I remember my daughter's birth. She was nearly 11 pounds and 23 inches. Although I wondered where I put her inside me, I was so happy to embrace my number two daughter. That was 40 years ago this September.

Jenni was the middle child, the peacekeeper in the family. She took care of me when I had complications from breast cancer and subsequent surgeries. She's a wonderful daughter. She had cancer too and was blessed to have survived it. For whatever reason or reasons you spared her life and kept her going in a pregnancy that lasted another seven months following the cancer surgery. What can I say but thank you?

You are
a gracious
and beneficent god.
How many
thank yous
does it take
to express
real gratitude?
Thank you
for my daughter,
all her gifts,
talents and love.
I am
very grateful.

Thankfully, Andrea

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

My dearest God,

Today I saw your face. I heard your voice. I experienced your presence.

We took our granddaughters to a concert in the park. We'd made it part of every summer's fun. We fixed a picnic, packed it up and drove it over. We set up our lawn chairs and dug in to the yummy fixings.

What a lovely setting I thought: blue skies with soft billowy clouds, cool temperature, family together, good eating and music. Usually the musical sounds are jazz, country, classical, 50's and 60's tunes or big band. The sound rocked my grandchildren but not my husband and me. It was when I started listening carefully to the words that I realized they were inappropriate for children. Harold leaned over and suggested we leave. His description of the music was "vile." I asked the kids what they thought. They didn't like the music but they were having fun making fun. It was definitely time to go.

As we drove away Harold suggested going to the beach. With a squeal in the back seat, we made our way at sunset. The girls asked to wade in the water. Who could say no to that? Before long they were wet to the waist. It was a most beautiful view: two girls, ages 9 and 10, romping in the water with their backs to the setting sun, the waves crashing and rolling in to shore, people throwing balls and letting their pets run to retrieve them, the waves crashing and rolling into shore, a mom and her three kids in wet suits frolicking in the ocean, lobster boats returning home with their catch, a cool breeze and my husband standing beside me with his arm wrapped around my shoulder.

But what was most beautiful to me was our granddaughters as the waves hit. They would laugh so hard, turn toward one another, and laugh again. As I stood back watching, I saw their profiles as the sun glowed on their faces. I heard their sweet voices yield to pure joy. I saw favorite cousins enjoying the moment together and I was certain I saw and heard you.

You appear
in so many
unexpected ways,
O God,
and what joy
fills my heart
when I
become aware
of your loving presence.
Fill me
to overflowing
with generous
love and faith
that I
may become
a waterfall
of pleasure
for you.

Love, Andrea

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Dearest God,

Last night in our backyard near the woods and river my granddaughters and I put up our small tent. Squashed together in sleeping bags, we uttered our prayers and fell asleep. Later I awakened to go to the bathroom and when I returned to our nighttime lodging, I smelled the scent of a skunk. Sure there was none around, I returned to my slumber. This morning when I crawled out of our humble sleeping abode, I walked up to the house and stepped inside. As I turned to look back outside, I saw the critter, all black and white with a big stripe up its back, a really large skunk sniffing the ground. I tried to get a picture but my batteries were dying.

What I have learned from you is that life is full of surprises. As I open myself to the adventures of everyday living, I experience all kinds of happenings. If I am flexible, able to roll with sudden, unexpected waves, I can find myself in the middle of all sorts of strange and unusual encounters. I can receive them as gifts, blessings from heaven or I can resist and complain about the hands I have been dealt. The blessing today was that I made it back outside in the darkness last night without being sprayed by a skunk. I consider that a true gift from above.

Thank you,
dear God,
for keeping me
on my toes.
I am yours.
My life
is yours.
What happens
to me
is already known
by you.
As I
trust you
to be
my guide,
my refuge,
and my center,
I will always
be poised
for what
happens next
and be thankful
for the possibilities
that come
from trusting you.

Love, Andrea

Monday, June 21, 2010

Dearest God,

What a gift it is to awaken refreshed. No worries or anxieties, no concerns or disappointments. Just a simple awakening celebrating life.

How often have I had something on my mind that limited my ability to rest well? How many times have I carried a burden to bed, not allowing myself to trust you with it? Way too many times!

Last night as I lay down worn from the heat of the day, I let myself go into your hands. I did not get upset but rather trusted you for my well being. I felt the joy of your grace and love so faith lulled me to sleep.

How good
it is
to be
in your company,
Gracious and Loving God.
How wonderful
to rest easy
in your arms.
Teach me
the way
of utter trust
when worries
search me out.
Give me
praiseworthy lips
that will
always cry out
your praise.

Thankfully, Andrea

Sunday, June 20, 2010

My dearest God,

My granddaughter Gabrielle took our picture as I sat on a stone bench and my husband stood to my side with the Nubble Lighthouse behind us. It was not only a beautiful scene; it was a picture of faith.

Your light has shone on us. We didn't always recognize it or see it. Sometimes the light was more visible than other times. And there were moments when darkness spread over us, a veil so thick that we could not see the light at all. But always, always, I am convinced, the light was present even if it was behind us.

I chose the lighthouse as the symbol for my letters to you for you are a beacon in my everyday living. When I feel lonely, I look toward the light. When I am afraid, I look for the light. When I am despairing, I cling to the light. When I am reveling in joy, I dance in your light. And that is when faith is most alive in me.

You, O God,
are pure joy.
You are
an ever-flowing fountain
of love
that results
in great joy.
Let your
light shine constantly,
I pray,
so that
we may
always find
our way
home to you,
the path
of faith.

Love, Andrea

Saturday, June 19, 2010

My dearest God,

I watched them as they frolicked on the beach, two little girls, my grandchildren. They ran into the ocean oblivious to the cold temperature of Maine waters. I remember my own daughters when they were that young.

Every day is an adventure for my granddaughters. We've planned more activities than are possible. But then why not? Part of the fun is brainstorming.

How blessed I am to be in their company, to watch them grow, ask questions, and give great big hugs!

Great Creator God,
thank you
for generations,
reminding us
just how good
you are.
You give us
love for
one another
and the ability
to share
our lives
with each other.
On this gorgeous
Saturday morning
I am
a very
happy grandma.

Love, Andrea

Friday, June 18, 2010

My dearest God,

A mind can have a photographic memory. Although I forgot my camera, I clicked pictures of my granddaughters as they skipped along the beach, running in and out of the ocean. I watched as they leaned over in search of heartstones, shells and seaglass. Their awe in finding a treasure was so beautiful to observe.

I recently had a conversation with someone who tends to see life through a broken lens. Life is not so good for this person as he peers at life unfolding. He sees the weeds before the flowers, the flawed before the perfect, the complicated before the simple. No amount of affirmation, support or varying perspective seems to change him.

As I consider these two scenes and conversations, I realize that every day you give us opportunity to see what we choose to see. We can see beauty in the not so beautiful by a simple shift in the lens. We can find blessing in the midst of despair. We can discover hope where hopelessness is rooted deeply. The answer is always a slight movement toward you.

Keep teaching me,
dear Lord,
to trust more
in you,
to observe life
through your lens,
and to act
upon your grace
with thanksgiving.

Love, Andrea

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Dear God,

Flying is a way to get from point A to point B; yet, I still have to deal with my fear of flying. I am better than I used to be because I have learned to run to you every time I am afraid.

Today I experienced the joy of flying with two of my granddaughters as we winged our way toward Maine. Gabrielle, 10, and Sophie, 9, are vacationing with us for several days. As I climbed aboard, I still felt the fear buddies roaming around in my stomach. I breathed in the air of faith and prayed. But I was not able to rid myself of all who seek my demise.

It was in thin air that I observed my grandchildren. Sophie was scared too but Gabrielle playfully engaged her, winning her over to trust in something higher than the lower fear. They laughed their way to the coast.

That small observation reminded me that in every situation where I experience fear, I have a choice to lean toward fear or trust. I can have the life sucked right out of me as I breathe fear or I can feel the calm that trust brings. By her example Sophie showed me that trust has more power than fear when we take the hand of someone who trusts more. She clasped Gabrielle's hand when we took off and when we landed. That simple act transformed her fear into faith.

It is true,
O God,
that children
will lead us
to greater levels
of tranquil living
if we
let them.
Today you pointed
to my granddaughters
to teach me
about greater trust
and faith.
Thank you.

Love, Andrea

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

My dearest God,

Staying in my children's homes, playing with grandchildren and talking with my daughters makes apparent your great love. Watching the little ones pray, thinking about others and being kind opens doors to my own heart. Why would I not want to spend more and more time with them?

How can we know your loving presence at times without a human contact? Oh, I can easily observe you in a sunrise or sunset, a blooming spring flower, a gray rainy day or the birth of color in the fall. But sometimes beautiful moments with you come when I see love alive through another person.

Last year I lived with my children a few weeks at a time when my world was crashing. They welcomed me with wide-spread arms. They gave me my own key and bedroom. They drew me to their table, fed me, encouraged me and prayed for me. Every time I came through the door, they smiled when they saw me. And every time I felt that I was in your presence.

I believe the genius of faith is the process of witnessing the divine in ordinary daily events. I believe you are revealed every day in a multitude of ways. I believe you kiss the earth and all of your children every morning and every night. Throughout the day you speak, telling us stories of creation which by the way occur daily. You unfold the sacred through relationships when one person cares for another. You bless us as we act morally, ethically and with high standards. You forgive us when we drop low. You pour mercy upon us when our hearts are robbed, our souls are depleted and our minds are confused. When decisions are made by leaders to better our lives I know you have visited us.

As I write you I am filled with gratitude.

Who can outlove you,
O God?
Who can
give as much
as you?
Who can touch
and inspire us
more than you?
How can
I express
my earnest thanksgiving?

Love, Andrea

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

My dearest God,

Following our Grandma/Granddaughters sleepover, I drove five-year-old Stella to church for Vacation Bible School but not before she told me the best thing she liked about VBS. "Grandma, God loves everybody all the time. God always loves us." She blurted out.

Although I have known God loves everybody since I was very young, I was delighted to hear the words of faith from my grandchild. She could have told me about the singing or the crafts and games, even about being with her friends but Stella chose to make a theological statement about you. She described her faith in you and what you do for us. As my only red-haired grandchild stepped out of the car and walked inside the church, I realized the voice I heard was yours.

Live in us,
Great Redeemer God,
speak through us
your message
of salvation
and goodness.
Remind us
to tell others
the good news
of hope
and love
and faith,
I pray.

Love, Andrea

Monday, June 14, 2010

Dearest God,

Two little girls ages four and five joined me today. My granddaughters Lucy and Stella are sweethearts. Because their older sisters will be spending 10 days in Maine with us, I wanted to spend time with the the little ones.

First we retrieved Grandpa Harold from the airport where I had taken him just a few hours before his plane was delayed, then canceled. Next we went to the bookstore where I read them a book and he bought them paint books. Then we painted at home, the pictures, themselves and the floor. We played card games and left to watch Lucy cheer at her cheer lessons.

Following that we stopped at a restaurant for supper when we were alerted to a tornado just six miles down the road. Unlike anyone else in the diner, we went to the restroom and sat on the floor under the counter just in case the tornado decided to strike. That's where we had our best discussion. "Do tornadoes have eyes, Grandma? Can they see us? Are they looking for us?" Lucy asked. "No, honey, they aren't looking for us." I replied. That's when we decided to pray. Each girl wanted to add something to the prayer. Stella prayed for the weather and then added a little girl's name Grace who has cancer. Lucy prayed for the tornado and three other children who either have cancer or terminal illnesses. What a thing of beauty to watch these young girls pray for sick children at a time when they were afraid for themselves.

As the dark clouds passed over without incident, we returned to our spaghetti giving thanks.

You are
a great God,
Wondrous Creator.
You remind us
to think
not only
of ourselves,
but others.
You remind us
to pray,
to ask
for healing
and hope.
You bring
to mind
your great love
especially for
the sick,
the poor,
the fearful.
You stir us
to love
and reach out.
How grateful
I am
for gentle reminders
and thoughtful granddaughters.

Love, Andrea

Sunday, June 13, 2010

Dear God,

Together we sang my favorite song Great is Thy Faithfulness. "Great is thy faithfulness, O God my father; there is no shadow of turning with thee. Thou changest not; thy compassions they fail not. As thou has been thou forever wilt be." What a magnificent song! The words say it all for me.

I have sung this song when my soul soared at great heights, having experienced wondrous times with you, my Great God, moments when your presence was so profound. I have also sung it when my soul dipped deep in despair, when my heart was breaking and my mind was filled with fear and grief. And I have sung it when doubt was pervasive at all levels in my life. Always, always you turned my head toward you; you sang words of hope, encouragement, and love to me.

As a pastor who has performed several hundred memorial services, I know the value and meaning of singing a great song of faith. At my own service some day others will sing this song because it says what I want said about you. I want a message of your faithfulness to be conveyed to those who will come. The gathering will be more about you than about me because you are the center of my life. I want my life to always point toward you.

Guide my life
toward heaven,
Loving God;
mould me
to your liking
so that
I may be
a servant
made in
your likeness.
Teach me
the ways
of Christ
so I may
sing forth
your praise.
Above all,
reveal your light
in me
so that
I may shine
for you
and the world,
I pray.

Love, Andrea

Saturday, June 12, 2010

My dearest God,

The song goes this way: "What a difference a day makes, 24 hours little hours..." What a difference a week, a month, a year makes, or can make.

When I am emotionally stuck, I can stay stuck for a very long time. I remember when our church was stuck, it seemed as if everything was paralyzed. But then things changed.

Two words repeatedly come to me when I am stuck: trust and obedience. Trust and obedience require me to change my modus operandi. I have to turn to you for guidance and leading. Trust means I need to put my need for control on the back burner. I have to seek out your will. I have to surrender fear and take your hand. I have come to the realization that you always have a plan, a destiny, a purpose for me when I am stuck. Trust means I seek out your direction, put faith in you to reveal the design and follow your lead.

To me obedience means doing what you will me to do. If trust means not being afraid to turn to you for direction, then obedience means doing what you ask. Obedience is all about allowing you to alter a situation, giving up my way and willingly follow your plan to a T.

As I look back and reflect, I see what a difference trust and obedience has made in my life and in our church's life. When I trusted you, when we trusted you, a plan developed. You revealed an image of life beyond the stuckness. You showed me/us the key; you opened the door to a new way, a different perspective, a fresh approach. When the picture unfolded, all I had to do, all we needed to do was accept the plan and live it.

How many changes you have made in me and in your church. How many times did you make mid-course corrections so that I, we would simply pause, listen, trust, pray and then move forward?

Teach me,
teach us
the way
of trust
and obedience,
Great and Wise God.
Open the windows
of heaven
so that
I, we may
see clearly
your divine plan.
Then give me,
give us
the desire
and will
to work
your plan.
Make a difference
in us
so that
our praise
will bubble up
and overflow.

Love, Andrea

Friday, June 11, 2010

Dearest God,

I don't know any of the campers caught in a flash flood in Arkansas. Yet, I pray for them, their families and friends, all those affected by the natural disaster that took dozens of lives.

You have created me to be touched by tragedy. You prick my soul every time something terrible happens. Whether to a large group of people by the tsunami or hurricane or to one mortally injured by a parent, you grieve my being so that I will care by praying, giving financially or helping in some way. You remind me that those impacted by cataclysmic events are surely members of my own family. You call me to be compassionate, to reach out in some way, to love as if my own blood.

I realize more and more how the inhabitants on this planet are kin to me. What happens to a starving child in Africa, a battered elderly person in America or an addicted teen in South America needs to influence my life. If not, I could grow callous believing that they are all someone else's problem. I believe you make us one and whatever shakes a soul on one side by nature will move the other side. It needs to be that way I am sure. Or else what will become of us?

Teach me,
O Lord,
the way
of compassion.
Lead me
to service
in your kingdom
for all
your children,
not just some.

Love, Andrea

Thursday, June 10, 2010

My dearest God,

I am confident you were in the room as 1,000 preachers sang the song It is Well with my Soul. "Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come, let this blest assurance control, that Christ has regarded my helpless estate, and has shed his own blood for my soul." We've all felt helpless in leading the church forward; we've known rejection, sorrow, deep disappointment, despair and fear. We have experienced personal troubles in life. Yet we lifted our voices, "It is well with my soul, it is well, it is well with my soul."

There is a strengthening of faith that occurs at our Annual Conference when we sing together. I always look around me while I sing; I want to see the faces of my colleagues. Many close their eyes. Several raise their hands. Many smile; some weep as they join their voices to make one body. We drink in the hope, the love, the peace and the joy you promise.

You are
our God;
we serve you
because you
first loved us.
We thank you
for faith
that sustains,
that removes
our sin
and forgives us.
We praise you
for inspiring us
and challenging us
to rise up
to higher levels
of trust.
Our hearts
are filled
with gratitude
for your compassion,
comfort and mercy
that has
spilt down
from heaven.
We sing
of you,
Gracious God,
and your
transforming power.

Love to you always, Andrea

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

My dearest God,

Sometimes I am not aware that transformation is taking place. It may be hours or days before I suddenly realize that a metamorphosis has occurred. But tonight I watched it happen. I was even a willing participant in another's change.

The person awakened with a plan for the day; however, a phone call changed everything. And then another call came. The day was charged with emotion. A sense of helplessness lead to feelings of anger and resentment which advanced to blame and judgement. At day's end the litany of woes began. That's where you whispered a little challenge in my ear. DQ, Drama Queen, came to life mimicking the world's ills and ails from the perspective of the other. Before long singing, smiling, teasing, laughing and praying replaced the downward spiral. Transformation was complete!

You, O God,
change us,
even unwillingly
at times.
You offer
a better way,
a different perspective,
a new old approach
to life
and you
make us anew
once again.
How grateful
are we
who take
the challenge.

Love always, Andrea

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Dear God,

I had boxed myself into a corner. I painted closer and closer until I was covered in paint.

Reflection is the art of looking back, assessing a situation, placing a value on what's happened and making a judgement. At times I can't fully know or understand life in real time until the clock has stopped ticking.

On occasion I will remember a specific period in my life. Certain elements will reveal themselves and I will recall how life was lived out. As I consider the characters, plot, setting and "who done it", I will come to realize the ways in which I had "painted" my life.

There were those moments when my thoughts, feelings and decisions led me to my corner. Tightening up, squeezing in, and growing ever smaller, my can spilled and paint went everywhere. Dripping in paint I heard your call to come closer, to draw near, paint and all, and to listen to yet another life lesson.

As I ponder my time in the corners of my life, I see how the main character was always you. I see how you picked me up, even getting paint on your own hands, washed me clean, spoke words of kindness and sent me on my way with a fresh can of paint.

Master,
thank you
for all
the paint
you have entrusted
to me.
Thank you
for allowing me
to paint myself
into corners
that would require
your special care.
Thank you
for all
the pick-me-ups,
the cleanups,
the words,
and the send-offs.
How blessed
I am.

Love, Andrea

Monday, June 7, 2010

Dearest God,

A few weeks ago I wandered through a department store looking for an item of clothing I needed. I saw many lovely things. I bought the article and left.

On a daily basis I receive all kinds of emails from specialty stores. There is always a sale on this and that and free coupons for books, apparel, lotions and coffee. Sometimes I see something that is really beautiful and I think about buying it. But then I consider for a moment and decide to refrain.

Last week I stopped at the curtain shop and saw many things that would look nice in our centuries-old house. That stop on the way back from the airport reenforced what I had been pondering. So what if I have more pretty stuff? It's just stuff and more of it. What difference does it make whether I have the latest and the best?

When I reduce everything down, I realize the one thing I need in my life is meaning. Is it meaningful to buy so much? No! Is it meaningful to hang with certain big-name people? No! Is it meaningful to rearrange my life to please others or receive their approval? No! What is meaningful is a life with you and precious others, making a contribution to the world, caring for the earth, making a difference where I can, giving to bringing joy, and scattering your light and love into the cosmos praying that it will light on others as a gift.

The air I breathe is yours. The land I stand on is yours. The water I drink is yours. The life I experience is yours. The love I know comes from you. The grace I receive comes from heaven. The mercy that has poured upon me originates from your hand. The renewal of my spirit is your work. The meaning to life, its purpose and intent and the goodness that follows all belong to you with love to us.

Oh thank you,
my gracious
loving God,
for the
enormous meaning
that touches
and inspires
my life
every day.
Who would
I be
without you?
What would
I be
without you?
What life
would I experience
without you?
Without you,
what is
truly meaningful?

Love, Andrea

Sunday, June 6, 2010

Dear God,

As I wrote to you this morning, I heard a church bell far away. I stopped, closed my eyes and listened. And I remembered.

I recalled the church bells of my childhood and youth at Grandma's tiny United Methodist Church in Atlanta, Indiana and Grace United Methodist Church in Elwood, Indiana. Then I was flooded with memories of the bells at Christ in the Desert Monastery in Abiquiu, New Mexico, at churches in Lourdes, Taize, Lisieux and Paris, France, the Vatican, in Assisi and other towns in Italy, England, and Maine all while I was on my clergy renewal. Those bells spelled a season of humility and great joy. Each one called out to the world to simply say that Christ was present.

This morning as I was walking down the street about to enter the Church on the Cape, a United Methodist Church in Cape Porpoise, Maine, I smiled as yet another bell cried out its message, really, your message of hope, love and peace.

Ring out
your gospel promise,
O God;
sing to us
of your salvation.
Tell the world
your promises,
Lord of all Creation.
You are God;
there is
no other.

Love, Andrea

Saturday, June 5, 2010

My dearest God,

We were simply going to have a light supper and pour over gardening books to design our common landscape area. However, during our meal we found ourselves sharing mystical experiences, moments when you, O God, came to us. For two hours we discussed monasteries, their daily rhythm, daily office, music and silence. We talked about visions, specific moments of revelation, miracles and beautiful experiences with you. What a time we had!

One of the many life lessons I have learned is expectancy. I have learned that you are always present, that you reveal yourself constantly. I do not have to hunt for you but rather wait patiently, open my eyes and ears, listen and watch. Throughout the day I will witness you one way or another, sometimes too numerous times to mention.

I saw you at the dinner table opening yourself to us as we shared treasured moments in your company. I heard your voice giving credence to simple moments of profound presence. I felt your amazing grace as we offered to one another sacred stories.

We each experienced prized happenings as children. We had a keen interest in anything sacred. We loved worship, mass, times when you were especially present. We have always carried a sense of the divine within us, knowing that you would present yourself along the way. We can't be persuaded not to believe or to try to humanly explain the unexplainable.

You, O God
of all creation,
you are sovereign,
mighty and powerful,
yet gentle
and compassionate.
You reveal yourself
in loving ways.
You speak
your message
of hope
every day.
You embrace us
with your
grace-filled love.
You whisper
words of comfort,
encouragement
and joy.
You make us laugh
and cry
at the
same time
when you
open yourself
to us.
We are blessed,
so very blessed.

Love, Andrea

Friday, June 4, 2010

My dearest God,

Whose hearts are not wounded by the sight of birds and marine life all covered in oil? Who does not feel the sting of perplexed animals who are destined to swim and fly but now are grounded by layers of black goo?

I remember reading the Genesis account of creation and feeling the awesome responsibility of taking care of the earth. Did you make a mistake trusting us?

If the earth truly is our dominion, have we not failed by polluting the air, land and sea? Have we not raped the creation of resources, stripped the land and water of its goodness and carelessly used it for our own pleasure or greed?

What can help us change ourselves?

O God,
mighty and powerful,
how can
we transform ourselves
into loving caretakers?
When and what
will it take
for us
to sacrifice ourselves
for others?
Will we
ever change
or will
we eventually destroy
what you
have given us?

Love, Andrea

Thursday, June 3, 2010

Dear God,

I am confounded by your mighty power that can make the human soul ready and the human heart grow in love again. I have felt the sting of lost love. I have experienced broken trust. I have closed my own heart and soul. Yet, amazingly by your own love I have come to deeply love anew and it is every day afresh.

I know what it is like to fantasize a love larger than life. I have experienced an unrealistic love that lead to disappointment and sadness. I thought I would never really love another time especially with one I had loved before. Yet, you had a plan for my life that would include a rebirth of hopeful love.

You are God,
author of
agape love.
You show us
your deep affection
as you
give yourself
to us
each day.
What can
we say
to so great
a God?

Love always, Andrea

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Dear God,

I live with a huge bank of memories. At almost any time like a finely oiled machine, a memory will move from its carefully filed existence to my current awareness. One met me early this morning.

Today is my favorite uncle's birthday. Uncle Merrill turned 86 today. I called and talked with him at 8:00 a.m. I wanted to be the first to wish him a happy day.

My uncle is my father's identical twin. He and Daddy looked alike, acted alike, drove the same kind and color of car for years, worked at the same organizations, and were in the Marine Corps together. They were witty, fun-loving, and enjoyed travel. When you saw one, you saw the other laughing and enjoying life.

As our conversation ended, Uncle Merrill said his infamous ending, "Goodbye Sweetheart." Tears filled my eyes because those were Daddy's words too and they sounded just like him. When I hung up the phone, I closed my eyes and imagined my father's smiling face before Alzheimer's robbed us. I remembered.

Thank you
for memories
that feed
my soul
with good food.

Love, Andrea

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

My dearest God,

Revision. Renovation. Reconstruction. Renewal. That's a pretty good description for my 200 year old home and my life.

I continue to work on the house. I will finish the closet in the next couple of days. I still have some small projects to do inside. It is looking more and more beautiful all the time. Then we will move outside. We plan to plant Lily of the Valley tomorrow.

I will work on my life for the rest of my life. I like the transformational process. Why do we fear change so much? Maybe it is because change makes us feel like we are on shaky ground. And maybe we are for a short distance. Like walking across one of those rope bridges to the other side. It's scary looking down. I always feel like it will break or I will simply fall. Yet when I get to the other side and stand on a solid rock, I feel good about walking across. I feel like I have overcome a fear. I like looking back from the other side.

Just as we are putting our home through a dramatic change, you have put me through the same thing. As I look at our "new" home, you remind me that you have the power to do the same work on me. I look at myself and marvel at the alterations you have made. I look pretty good too.

I applaud you,
Great Moulder
of Human Life,
for your
transformative power.
Thank you
for your commitment
to changing
our lives
for the good.

Love, Andrea

Monday, May 31, 2010

Dear God,

I worked in the closet all day as I listened to music written by those with soul. Sweet Hour of Prayer. It is Well with My Soul. Eternal Father Strong to Save. Nearer My God to Thee. Abide with Me. O God Beyond All Praising.

While I washed the woodwork and floor, sanded irregularities, filled cracks and holes, sanded a few more times, swept and washed the floor again and painted, I sang, hummed and whistled all the while drawing close to you. I felt as if the space where I labored was filled with you.

Something happens inside me as I allow music to penetrate my soul. Like opening a door and saints and angels walking through. They stir gently within me, whispering truths of heaven. They unlock secrets to mysteries waiting to be solved. They touch me, inspiring me to greater faith and love.

Although I was painted up good (I am such a sloppy detailed painter), my fingers sticking together with oil paint, a glob of white in my hair and on my socks imprinting the same image each time I moved, I felt so blessed to be in your beautiful presence.

It makes
no difference
where I am
or what
I am doing,
you come
to me.
Not because
I am worthy
or favored
but because
your love
is that big.
You wash
over me,
leaving behind
a residue
of pure joy.
What can
I say
to you,
God Most Loving?

Forever yours, Andrea