Saturday, February 26, 2011

Dear God,

Tonight in our living room sat survivors, two from a fire that destroyed their home, another who battled ovarian cancer, a recovering addict, one who fought physical and emotional abuse, a second one from emotional abuse, one who nearly died with a rampant blood infection and 25 necessary surgeries on various body parts, a woman who faced two kinds of breast cancer, another whose own heart only functions at 10%, another with heart problems, one who was diagnosed with prostate cancer and dementia, a man who was hit by a drunk driver when he was 16 and left bleeding and dying on the road, one other who has battled dark depression for years, another whose arteries are so clogged that the doctors said they could never operate again and one who has spots on her brain due to years of excess smoking. They are my family.

For years we were at odds with one another. And then a good healthy dose of your spirit swept through for whatever reason changing everything, transforming us into a family who suddenly cared very deeply.

Now we get together every month or two for a meal, games, hilarity, hugs and hope. We love being together for we know that we are growing older and we want our children and grandchildren to see a family at peace having fun, praying together, sharing with one another and reaching out.

We've been transformed not because we were skilled negotiators or for that matter even that we were sacrificial with one another. We have been altered because your agape love penetrated our hearts, minds and souls giving us better options for human life together.

So much grace
in one room,
what can
I say?
Your spirit
has given us
so many
second chances
and we
are grateful.
We see
the light shining
and we know
its radical source.
We lean
toward it now
because we realize
any other option
is just
plain stupid.

Love, Andrea

Friday, February 25, 2011

Dear God,

Recently on a covenant group retreat you taught us yet another life lesson. Living in the light once we know the light is present puts us in places of responsibility. Living in the darkness limits our ability to see, understand and act positively and meaningfully. But when the light comes and our vision is no longer impaired, as individuals we must take responsibility for our attitudes, judgements and actions.

We confessed that like most people on the planet we cope by returning to familiar past ways when pressed in current stressful situations. We acknowledged that living in darkness is not easy but it has its benefits. It is predictable and known even if it is miserable.

However, because each of us is committed to your greater light, we are desirous in finding that light which leads us to valuable truths. There you give us desire, power, and a willingness to lean toward the future with a transforming, determined spirit.

One of the joys we carry with us at all times is one another. Twenty three years ago we promised to pray for one another. We know our spiritual companions pray for us daily. We also carry trust, that unseen act of loyalty, that gives us a sense of safety, hope, and grace. Presence, prayer and trust give us that extra nudge to be our best for you.

You are
the greatest teacher,
dear God.
You know
our inner selves
so well
for you
made us.
Teach us
your life lessons
so that
we may
fully live
for you.

Love, Andrea

Thursday, February 24, 2011

Dear God,

A surprise visit to my uncle and aunt's apartment took me back home. These two wonderful people (two of my favorites) remind me of my history and the history of my family. Eighty seven and eighty five respectively they know the ins and outs of the family out of which I was shaped.

My uncle is my father's twin brother but then you know that. Every time I look at him, hear him talk, walk, laugh or tease, I see and hear my own father. I remember so many incidents when I am in his company.

I find myself on the family farm once again, sitting around the big dining room filled with homemade pies, noodles, preserves, rolls and deliciously more. I hear the sounds of laughter in every room and smell the aromas of raisin pudding, stewed tomatoes and brown beef gravy. I see the joy in my grandmother's eyes as she catches a glimpse of each one of us arriving. I hear the gentle quiet when 35 or 40 of us still ourselves long enough to hear the simple prayer of thanksgiving and blessing and then see the mad rush for the first scoop of spaghetti and cheese.

My uncle is now frail, a victim of Parkinson's Disease. His 6'4" frame is slightly bent as he attempts several times to get up from his chair. His voice is about one quarter of the strength it used to be when he and his brother, my father, cheated in Rook and laughed like two fools. But his eyes and his heart convey as fully as ever the love he holds for each member of our family. When he puts his big arms around me, kisses me on the cheek, and tells me he loves me, I get an inkling of eternity's love in the arms of my heavenly father, you, my God, and I squeeze right back in gratitude and praise.

Loving God,
in so
many ways,
you reveal yourself
to us.
You whisper
eternity's hope
as we
face the issues
of our day.
You remind us
that we never
walk alone.
You are
with us
teaching us
the sacred mysteries
and how
wide and deep
your love is
for all
your people.
All my love
and devotion
are due you.

Always, Andrea

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Dearest God,

The free flow of spiritual thought lead us in scattering directions all at the same time. Our theologies converged as we opened ourselves to your leading. As we applied our insights to our own lives, to our covenant group and to the church at large, we felt a sense of liberation as we considered a fresh outlook on the future.

Did we have to carry our heavy baggage into the future or were there other choices we asked ourselves. We smiled, even laughed at the absurdity of past choices that lead us in circles again and again and again and again. Becoming aware of the exits leading to exciting adventures, separately and together we moved into the nearest "grocery store" to exchange the old for the new lightening the load, equipping us for the move and refreshing us for the journey. Although our journeys would take us away from each other as we pilgrimed alone, we realized as spiritual companions we would always travel together.

To move from "stuck" places together we consolidated our gifts and moved forward leaving our inertia, fear, doubt and insecurities behind. We observed one another as we pulled together, hearing that pop as we left our potholes in the dust. What a sound of relief and joy!

Although I have to confess that my own movement was a thrill, it was glorious to hear the sounds of the empty potholes of my spiritual friends. Doing it together was a spectacular spiritual and emotional activity. I sensed that we will each have the temptation to return to the dusty old places of false refuge but we will never return not knowing the truth of the lonely diabolical schemes to keep us in places of destruction and death.

Who can reveal
the truth,
give power,
and birth joy
like you,
O God,
who?

Love, Andrea

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

My dearest God,

We came together as pilgrims, searchers of the living word. We wanted a breath of your fresh spirit living inside and within us. We believed you were present and abiding. We were not disappointed.

A metaphor surfaced and together we reached for new understandings. You lead us to facts we had missed. We shared and prodded one another to look deeper, to travel further uncovering the past in the turns and twists of human living. Like archaeologists we gently brushed away the dust of years gone by and took yet another look. There we found secret treasures revealing the divine in the midst of our human journey.

The aha moments directed us back to you, the true source of our discovery. We realized that there was much left behind in our haste to move into the future with light packs. But our healings, our wholeness, and our power for the future could not be attained without a brief trip back to reclaim the gifts awaiting us.

Like a caravan we traveled together arriving at our destinations pretty quickly because we knew the routine, the challenges, and the hardships; however, once there we grabbed our tools and began to dig, assisting one another in those hard out-of-the-way places. As old truths began to yield life-giving information, we found exactly what we needed in order to move forward.

We began to laugh as another metaphor came into play. Oh how many times, we said to one another, did we return to the old patterns of yesterday, going round and round and round and round, not able for whatever reason to take the road leading us into the morning sunshine of a transformed life. But while there we picked up an unfamiliar language, now a new way to challenge one another in our resistance, reluctance, and unwillingness to budge from "stuck" places. We spoke it all throughout the day causing us to burst into spontaneous laughter again and again. What breakthroughs emerged as we laughed at ourselves and chose the next exit leading us into our exciting adventures.

Only you,
O God,
only you
can lead us
into places
we refused
to go.
For there
you lovingly
guided us
to dimensions
of love
and grace
that carried us
forward in faith.

Yours forever, Andrea

Monday, February 21, 2011

Dearest God,

We were just apart for just three days but the longing in our hearts made it seem much longer. A sweet reunion awaited us today as he drove up about 5:00 p.m.

How do you change the heart? How do you transform the mind shifting its thoughts, beliefs and gestures? How do you stir the soul and show a different picture than one that has been seen for a long time? How do you do it?

What seemed so impossible to me became so possible with you. I was hemmed in by negative thoughts and beliefs. I was trapped in the fortress of my own making so I could protect myself. I was lost in a lonely world.

Yet, when you came through revealing a shining truth, a clearer picture, an alternative perspective, a way to a new beginning and a challenge to dump my painful past making a path for the future, everything changed. Faith lifted me higher and higher until all I could see were the halls of heaven.

As we walked into one another's arms, eternity's miracle touched us once again.

Gracious and Loving God,
thank you
for our miracle,
the one
that keeps
giving us signs
of liberation,
hope,
freedom,
love and joy,
transformation.
Until the
end of time,
you have
our hearts
of grateful praise.

Love, Andrea and Harold

Sunday, February 20, 2011

Dear God,

There is no song like Great is thy Faithfulness. It says it all for me. It wraps up my theology in a nice little package. Great is your faithfulness, Lord, unto me.

You are great, O Lord. Your faithfulness touches me daily. I know the sound of birds singing is your song of creation. As friendships develop, as my marriage continues to grow secure and joyous, as I am able to sing after a long time of silence due to surgery, as life unfolds with precious insights and revelations, as healing occurs and hope is found, I experience your faithfulness.

I have come to realize that your faithfulness is not about answering every prayer I pray. It is not about giving me everything I want. It is not about making the world a perfect place. Your faithfulness is about your daily presence in my life.

Who could want more than a daily walk with our redeemer and friend? Who could ask for more than a loving presence who brings joy, peace, comfort, faith, friendship, laughter, and so much more?

As I processed down the aisle today at church singing our opening hymn, I was singing my faith, my belief, my love, and my praise to you, Holy God. I was declaring through song your continuing faithfulness not just to me but to all of us.

Great and Wondrous God,
all praise
is due you.
All glory
is yours.
Thank you
for your faithfulness
and for
the ways
you teach me
about faith.
Keep me
in your care,
I pray,
so I
may sing
the wonders
of your love.

Forever yours, Andrea

Saturday, February 19, 2011

Dear God,

The sound of children praying touches my heart deeply. The innocence of toddlers, preschoolers making their prayers to you gives me the sense that generational faith makes a difference.

I spent the night with three of my grandchildren. As always we slept on the floor in our sleeping bags. When I awakened my five-year-old granddaughter stirred and turned over staring me in the face. "Hi Grandma." She said. There we engaged in the things on Lucy's mind as she shared one thing after another. She is never at a loss for words.

Later Lucy would pray at the kitchen table. "Dear God, thank you for letting Grandma come over." Lucy has a beautiful way of praying just like Gabrielle and Rylan. They know you and regularly pray for food, family, friends, people who are sick, and children around the world.

What inspires me is remembering my grandmother praying at meal times, at bedtime, in her chair when she read the Upper Room, in her Sunday School class that she helped lead and any other time when she felt led to pray. I often wondered if she prayed as she worked in her flower gardens and truck patch.

My grandmother's prayers taught me to pray and I taught my children. Now my children's children are praying to the same God my grandmother knew. I don't know how my grandchildren will turn out, what they will choose as their life's vocation, who they will marry or how they will live out their faith, I just know they know who to turn to during life's ups and downs. For that I am very grateful.

There is
a sweetness
to my
grandchildrens' prayers.
Thank you
for speaking
to them
and through them,
O God.
Please bless
their heavenly efforts
so they
may bless others
around them,
I pray.

Love, Andrea

Friday, February 18, 2011

My dearest God,

I have come to the conclusion that great spiritual happenings, those events I can point to that changed my life are not nearly as meaningful as your day-to-day appearances. Although high moments make me sit up and take notice big time, it is the daily insights that prepare me for the times of your great visitation.

When I open my eyes daily to your comings, I see many wonders that cause my faith to grow. A beautiful red cardinal on the bare branches of my crabapple tree with the backdrop of freshly fallen snow remind me of the magnificent beauty you have created. A moment of exquisite hope has your name written all over it. A change of direction in a challenging situation is a sign to me that you are at work in my life.

While I am still savoring the many joys uncovered on my last retreat, it is the daily song my heart is singing of second chances that inspire me to remember you.

Amazing God,
daily walks
with you
infuse my faith
with energy,
hope, and peace.
Your many gifts
remind me
to sing
your song
of eternal joy.
I shall always
be grateful.

Love, Andrea

Thursday, February 17, 2011

Dearest God,

We had not seen each other for some time so we planned a time for coffee. She took me on a tour of the newly renovated spaces in her home. It was fun to see all the changes that she and her husband had made.

But it was what we did later that inspired me so much. Every topic we discussed seemed to direct us toward faith, what you have done in our lives since we last spent time together. For five hours we found ourselves in your divine circle.

When you gave us the ability to peel back the layers of human living, you always appeared. Whether talking about health, relationships, nature, friendships, or marriage each subject caused us to circle round to you once again.

What I learned during our time together is that to some you are an unseen presence while to others you are very much apparent. Your doings in human history are positively life giving, energizing, and joyous even when they were difficult, challenging and painful.

What joy it gave my friend and me to spend our time rejoicing in you!

Good God,
you fill us
with all
the ingredients
for a
meaningful life.
Through our
life experiences,
you show us
the way
to you.
My heart
sings your praise.

Love, Andrea

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Dear God,

I love your surprises! I love the unfolding of a miracle, the birthing of something new, a creative twist, the coming together of a relationship, the dispersion of light in the darkness, the emergence of hope and faith coming to life.

Daily I witness epiphanies, sacred moments in history where so clearly I see your hand at work. When the first bud breaks through earth's crust in spring, I marvel and pray my thanksgivings. When hope begins to form, I say, "O my God!" When your light overcomes the darkness of death and grief, I know you have visited the soul.

The dynamic process of the divine in human life energizes me like nothing else. I believe the power that originates out of your love touches, inspires, moves, kindles, graces and transforms like no one else can. To witness these events is to see you in action. Love grows inside me when you catch my eye performing a healing, building hope, and creating anew.

Wondrous God,
thank you
for your
glorious activity.
Thank you
for giving me
eyes to see,
and ears
to hear
your presence
on earth.

Love always, Andrea

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Dear God,

What is prayer really? Is prayer the utterance of human words urging God to do something on our mind? What more is prayer, dear Lord?

There are moments when prayer feels like music, a grandchild's laugh, a daughter's smile, my husband's gentle kiss. Prayer seems like being inside you. I sense a movement from where I am to where you are. I feel the entrance to another world, a divine realm, a vast spiritual energy space where the things of eternity draw me miniaturizing the things of earth. Prayer is the intimate bond between the divine and the human. It is the intimate dance of God and me or you and anyone else. Prayer is like light that slowly and quietly creeps into the darkness. It is the coming together of spiritual forces. It is power that breaks evil and robs fear of it threat. Prayer is the sweet chant of love and forgiveness, of mercy and compassion, of hope, thanksgiving and praise. Prayer is an active gesture of faith leading to wonderment, peace, joy and transformation. Prayer is saying yes in the midst of the no in human life. Prayer is connection on every level.

My heart's desire is to link myself with you as a daily lifestyle, not as something I do to make you accessible to me. I want my life to be full of you as I live and move and have my being as it says in the bible. I want my all to be living in you and you living in me.

What is the truest essence of life if not a deep connection with you?

Make me one
with you,
Esteemed Creator;
make my life
your own.
Teach me
the way
of heaven
that I may
live on earth
even as
in heaven.
Make me
a radiant light
of you,
I pray.

Love, Andrea

Monday, February 14, 2011

My dearest God,

A hard life lesson you taught me was about expectations. One of the major shifts that took place in my soul had to do with changing what I expected from myself and others. Learning what was reasonable, rational and life-giving was very challenging as I faced difficulty on seemingly every level of my life. Yet, you had me walk through a thin veil to see life from an altered perspective. There you sat me down and began to speak of hope in transformation.

That conversation brought great benefits and rewards, one that I received just today. There was a time when I wanted the ideal. I wanted the picture perfect relationship in the magazine. I wanted what I perceived to be the joy shown on their picture perfect faces. Nonsense, I realize today, nonsense.

As you did your mind and soul altering work on me, I realized that faith had a mighty role to play in setting expectations. What freedom came when I rearranged my thoughts, beliefs, hopes and dreams allowing you to participate at a deeper level. What praise bubbled up as I listened and followed you into blessed arenas of change.

Today as I sat with my husband I realized how much work you have done to change us. And as a result our reconstructed expectations have given us far more than either of us could have envisioned. What blessing came as we prayed giving thanks.

Loving God,
gratitude seems
so small
compared to
your mighty
change work.
Yet it is
what I
bring today,
a heart
full of gratitude.
All glory
is due you,
O Great One.

Always yours, Andrea

Sunday, February 13, 2011

My dearest God,

It's been years since I last saw Mary who now lives in Minnesota. We were so happy to run into one another at church. We just hugged and hugged.

Because I had just seen her daughter a few weeks earlier, she was updated on the goings on in my life as I was hers so we stood in the hall and celebrated each other's lives. What a picture of heavenly joy we were as we talked about your miracle work and our own faith.

At a time when I couldn't imagine anyone really cared, I have learned since that many people were praying for my family. "I prayed so many prayers for you and Harold." Mary told me. We hugged again as I gave her the Reader's Digest version of the vision you gave me. "Mary, because you were one of those who prayed, I saw your prayers as light in my vision. You are part of the miracle that Harold and I experienced." We hugged one last time as I had to get seated in the choir. She thanked and thanked me for sharing and for telling her she was an important participant in the unfolding miracle in our lives.

What a beautiful time we had together sharing your grace. It wasn't that many years ago when we were heartily praying for Mary and her family. She too discovered your miraculous inspiration and overcame a dramatic problem herself.

I believe our time of sharing is exactly what you want from your people. I believe we are not meant to hoard our good times, our faith experiences, our growth, struggles and challenges. I believe we are to say a good word for your loving gestures in human living. And what comes from it? So much joy, warmth, hope, peace, faith and a desire to keep on sharing your good news!

Truly you
are the God
of faith,
of love,
hope, joy,
and peace.
There is
no one
like you,
Eternal God.
Thank you
for drawing
people together
to share
in one
anothers' lives.
Thank you
for making us
a community
that cares.
Continue to
teach us
your ways,
O Lord,
so we
may participate
in adding
to each
other's joy.

Love, Andrea

Saturday, February 12, 2011

My dearest God,

How is it possible? Why would you do it?

For years I prayed specific prayers for change and transformation. I wanted a shift not only in myself but also in my husband. I wanted a relationship full of empathy and compassion, honor and respect, mutual sharing and spiritual kinship, love and genuine understanding. I wanted healing, wholeness, hope, joy and peace. I wanted a blending of hearts and spirits. I wanted you to be center of who and what we were. I wanted a marriage made in heaven.

Tonight at the Valentine dinner and dance with 1,000 people in the new JW Marriott Hotel while I stood in line for my stir fry dinner you came to me whispering, "I have answered your every prayer." I smiled with thanksgiving in my heart.

I once thought change was the most difficult challenge in the world. At several points I was confident that it was impossible. Even when I saw a tiny spark of hope, I could only imagine a lot of hard work where you took one step forward and two back. So many times I gave up, letting my soul grieve again and again.

But then change came like spring after a long trying winter. You came into our living room shaking the room making me think tragedy was about to strike. But then you unrolled a screen before me with a living picture that mesmerized me. You had my every atoms' attention. I watched and listened. I witnessed the countless thousands of prayers prayed on our behalf. When the points of light joined exploding at the center, everything changed. In a split second the way I saw things, felt things, interpreted things and knew things, changed. I had to look around the room to make sure I was in the same place, in my own home. I had to look in the mirror to make sure the image was mine. Following that gigantic geological plate shift I simply followed your lead and that led me into a new chapter in my life, our life together.

I am convinced that some things are impossible without your help. Like poured concrete that hardens, there is no give. Yet, life is filled with infinite possibilities with your help and guidance. Trusting your grace to open doors and windows to our own souls as well as those around us makes for an adventurous, exciting life. The joy I have experienced these last several months is a testimony to what you can and want to do in every human life. I am sure of it!

All glory
is yours,
Powerful and Loving God;
no one
can do
what you do!
All praise
is yours.
May I forever
sing your song,
the song
of hope,
peace, possibility
and joy.

Love always, Andrea

Friday, February 11, 2011

Dearest God,

I remember so well the little boy and the little girl putting their hands forward to shake ours. They must have been five or six years old. Literally living in the middle of miles of garbage, they stood barefoot, filthy and smiling as they welcomed us to their home in Cairo, Egypt. It was there I learned the true meaning of "poor."

On our trip to the Middle East, we met the Coptics, the first Christians. We heard the story of how your own son was taken to Egypt to save him from slaughter. We listened mesmerized by the ministry of love the Coptics have for those generations of people who have lived and continue to live in what they call Garbage City.

These last 18 days as I watched the protesters calling for freedom in Tahrir Square I thought of those children who by now would be in their twenties but still not recognized as legitimate citizens because of their background. Relegated to the dump because they came from the south, I wonder now what freedoms they will find. Will they be freed too? Will they at long last be given a promise for a better future? Will they be welcomed into society like they welcomed us?

God So Full of Grace,
make us
all free,
not just
some of us.
Help us
to free
one another
in love.
Teach us
the way
of compassion,
then make
us all liberators
remembering that
no one
is higher
or lower
than another.
Instill in us
the truth
that we
are all
brothers and sisters,
children of one God.

Love, Andrea

Thursday, February 10, 2011

My dearest God,

Twenty one years of correspondence, letters, cards, notes written by members and friends of my churches. For days I have been reading words penned to me by hundreds of people. I finally decided it was time to give thanks and then let go.

Once again I acknowledged the privilege it is to be allowed into persons' lives, into the halls of fear and faith, of doubt and clarity, and of despair and hope. What trust it takes to share from those inner places where questioning takes place.

I realized that I was witnessing your testimony. I could see your face, hear your words, and smell the sweet scent of your loving grace. Your power was evident as I listened to pilgrims on the search for God in the midst of the human condition. Some have moved from this world to the next. Yet, even as I read, I sensed the living nature of faith that is never outdated or old.

The correspondence
read like
a litany
of love
for you,
God Most High.
For truly
you are
the light shining
in each life.
Praise to you,
God of Great Love.

Always, Andrea

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Dear God,

In your wisdom you have made us all different. Not only do we speak many languages, we celebrate many cultures and traditions. We wear brown skin, black, yellow, white and red.

Tonight I was conscious of our uniqueness as our choir sang a diverse range of music. I felt the presence of composers who knew you and called you by many names. We sang their messages of faith, hope, truth and love.

I love this part of my life, singing music from the heart, written from the heart, inspired out of the heart. I am always aware of those whose hearts were open to you in the composition of music that speaks about life with you, about a belief in you, about who you are and what you do and are about.

Music has always stirred my soul. In my restlessness music became my resting place. In my joy it has become my place of celebration. In my sorrow music invited me to trust. In my despair music led me to hope.

Because you have spoken to people of all ages, nations, races, faiths and backgrounds, we have music to soothe the soul, to lift it up, to challenge and disciple us, to inspire and motivate us and to give us many ways to sing your praise.

God of Many Names,
I give thanks
for persons
who listen
to you,
who follow
your lead
to write songs
for the heart.

Love, Andrea

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Dear God,

I'm cleaning out, uncluttering, and surrendering pieces of my life. A recent house renovation changed the way things look in our home. The renovation is so beautiful giving us new views from our writing room window and the basement.

Now I am deciding what I want to keep from my past. I am looking through old pictures, files, papers, boxes, envelopes...years of my life in ministry and all areas of my 64 years on the planet. Perhaps transforming rooms in our home has given me "permission" and a desire to let go of items that clearly identified me as a minister, daughter, wife, mother, grandmother, and friend. I am choosing now what I want to keep, what I want to give away and what I want to throw away.

Really it is a liberating experience. The more secure and confident I feel about myself, the less need I have to hold on to things that give the impression of who I am. Letters from parishoners who say how "wonderful" I am are not necessary anymore. I can let them go.

I realize that I regularly need to do an inventory of who I am and what I am about so I can make the necessary adjustments to your will for me. Outwardly I may look a particular way but inwardly I may need to shift, alter and change my life which can give me a new appearance, one that is more in keeping with your design for this body, mind and soul.

Great God of Challenge and Transformation,
may I
be so
in tune
with your will
that I
automatically follow
your creation plan
for me.
May I
not hide
behind obstacles
of the past
and present
but rather
step out
of my
hidden places
to show myself
to you.
Renovate me,
O Lord,
transform me,
O God,
make me anew,
God So Full of Grace.

Love, Andrea

Monday, February 7, 2011

Dear God,

Today you answered a long breathed prayer. I received that which I had longed for. From the inside out, I was happy. I was happy. As I sat in my warm home looking outside at the magnificent snowy scene, giving thanks for my wondrous gift, I was happy.

At the same time a scene flashed by me and I stopped, paused to reflect, to consider the pictures before me. A mother who couldn't feed her child. A teenager forced into slave labor. A family with no home. Rural mountain people with no medicine. A child with no one to love her. Scores of people in refuge camps barely living from day to day. Broken people, lost, lonely and suffering.

While I celebrated my blessing in the comfort of an American home, abundant freedom and lots of love from family and friends, you brought to me a picture of life occurring right now to millions of people. You reminded me of the plight of so many. While I received my heart's desire, millions prayed for food, freedom, and help.

Although I was grateful for my many blessings, you stirred me to remember others. What do I do, Good Lord? What do I do?

Teach me compassion
and mercy,
O God,
I pray,
not the kind
where all
I do
is pray.
Show me
how to give
where it counts.
Remind me
that I
am not
charged with filling
my own storehouse
but helping others.

Gratefully, Andrea

Sunday, February 6, 2011

Dearest God,

Why is prayer all about what we want you to do for us instead of the other way around? Why do we expect so much from you and so little from ourselves? It seems we expect you to do for us what we are not willing to do for ourselves.

So often, O Lord, we ask you to change someone who is at odds with us. Our prayers assume the posture that the other person needs changing. We do not consider the work needing done within ourselves.

I learned a lesson when I started praying for a number of people who I felt had harmed me in one way or another. Over time my heart softened and so did my attitude toward them. I realized then that when we pray something happens inside us, perhaps more than those we pray for.

As I listen to my own prayers, I am convicted and convinced that I need to do more to bring about your will on earth instead of my own. I become conscious of my need to work on my own insides before I pray for someone else's work.

Help me,
O Lord,
to remember
the beginning
of the prayer
you taught us
to pray.
"Our father,
who art
in heaven,
hallowed be
thy name,
thy kingdom come,
thy will
be done..."

Love, Andrea

Saturday, February 5, 2011

Dear God,

Joy comes in so many packages. As I live each day in the calm of your spirit, joy has the chance to fill my soul.

Just today alone, joy found me so many times. My hubby and I talked for a long time at the kitchen table, baring our innermost thoughts about spiritual need, church, vision and faith. Fluffy white snowflakes fell once again making for yet another magnificient view just outside our writing room window. A retreatant wrote calling me a heartstone for helping her. Two grandchildren came to stay with us for the night so we squeezed into one bed with them insisting I be in the middle as their grandfather brought us popcorn and malted milks while we watched Nanny McFee Returns.

How wonderful it is to welcome joy into my every day living. As I trust you, live out of faith, revoke the temptation to be judgemental at times, count my blessings and give of myself in appropriate quantities remembering to take care of myself, joy grows like yeast rising.

Source of grace and joy,
I bow
to you
out of gratitude
and thanksgiving.
You are
my life's
greatest joy.
Let my joy
return to
its source
with blessing,
I pray.

Love, Andrea

Friday, February 4, 2011

Dearest God,

Women are singing their heartsongs to you, O God, each a love song to the world. As I hear from one and then another, I am reminded of your lovely presence throughout the whole of the cosmos. One song sung rises up and outward touching the lives of those around them. When reached, some hold tightly to their chest hoping, praying that the power of the song will enter their own hearts restoring order, renewing faith, revitalizing life.

One woman reached out today giving me the opportunity to sing my own song. As the sound reached her, she grabbed hold finding peace from torment and strife. She wrote back acknowledging the power of your spirit.

What more could you want, dear God?

Keep us singing
to you
and one another.
Remind us
that the song
is truly
the song
of faith
begun at
the beginning
of time.
Help us sing
the old,
old song
of eternity.

Love, Andrea

Thursday, February 3, 2011

Dearest God,

There is no power like yours. There is no love like yours. There is no peace like yours.

Last weekend I observed your loving presence among women on retreat. I watched as women opened themselves to your power, to your love and hope, and to a new level of trust. I saw apprehension and reluctance refashioned into courage, determination and willingness. I witnessed the work of your spirit.

As a retreat leader, I know I have no power to change human lives. I do what I am lead to do to put together a construct that can lead us to discovery, insight, affirmation, and the ability to take flight. You, however, are the power beneath the wind that propels us forward.

As I continue to hear of life after retreat, I quietly breathe prayers of thanksgiving and praise as I celebrate your continued work in their (our) lives.

Thank you,
O God,
for your
glorious work
in human lives.
As we
lift off,
recognizing the power
of your spirit,
we soar
in great joy
knowing you
are the power
beneath our wings.

Gratefully yours, Andrea

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Dear God,

How do we prepare for a changing world? How do we alter our view of life as we have come to know it? How do we participate in a transformation where the major players exchange places?

Nothing remains the same although at times we try desperately to keep them a particular way. The familiar is easy because we know it. It's predictable, consistent and regular. But the world is changing and as a world citizen I need to change with it.

As I watch the disturbing images of chaos in the Middle East and I realize governments (good or bad) could topple, I wonder what my responsible role is for the next years of my life. How do I contribute to a changing world? How do I speak of change? How do I accept new brothers and sisters in and out of power? How do I help bring about change that embraces a holy view of human living?

Am I amenable to change? Are my feet flexible, ready to move with the times? Am I able to bend in the direction of your will? Is my attitude one of inclusion and acceptance? Am I willing to alter my actions giving in to what is best for the most?

As I consider my place in relationship to you, I realize that a growing faith will change me. It must; otherwise I could become complacent, selfish and self centered, demanding and narrow minded. I must be open, willing to listen, and to pray for my own change as well as the change of others around me at home and around the world. I must let love lead and guide me.

Your will
and your way
will always
change me,
O God.
Teach me
the means
to be
putty in
your hands
so that
I may
be shaped
by One
who is able
to make me
into a creature
of love,
faith, hope
and peace.

Love, Andrea

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Dearest God,

In my contemplative garden St. Francis stands poised holding the "shiny rocks" given to him by my young grandchildren. When I visit state parks, I bring home small polished rocks and hide them among the other stones surrounding my pond. When the grandchildren come to visit, they love to make their way to the garden in search of shiny rocks. How fun to observe them when they discover one of the gems, holding it high showing me their treasure.

The shiny rocks are not just more colorful or beautiful than all the rest. They are prayer stones. When the kids find them, they know to breathe a prayer before they gently place them at the feet of St. Francis. Sometimes they will fill their little fists full of Tigers Eyes, Lace Agate, Moss Agate, Sugilite, Carnelian, Amethyst, Rose Quartz and more and then take the short walk to St. Francis where they pause to pray for family members, friends who are sick, children from around the world, different people suffering with cancer, and other needs they have heard about on the news. Following their prayers they lay the stones in St. Francis hands, on his feet, in his cowl, and on the ground next to him.

As I look upon him this morning, he is layered in ice from the storm. He holds each stone, each prayer last prayed for by a grandchild. So like you.

Gracious God,
it seems
the whole world
points to you.

Love, Andrea

Monday, January 31, 2011

Dear God,

Sweet after retreat reflections inspire me to give praise, to sing aloud, to dance in my heart as I remember the many gifts you gave to women who participated. They did what they thought they could not do and they did it so beautifully. I could have sworn that angels were among us as we sat on the floor drawn into our worship altar by heartstones of the past and present, all symbols and signs of your living presence alight with the radiance of Christ himself.

I believe there is nothing more beautiful than the movement of your spirit. As the gentle breeze blows, your loving mystery surrounds us, invading us with love that we can't begin to explain. The warmth of your fire burning within us rekindles our love for you and others around us. We are somehow altered as a shift takes place allowing room for deeper faith, trust, hope and courage. Sweet, so heavenly sweet!

Make us witnesses
to your
divine touches,
Loving God.
Let courage
well up
within us
that we
may bless others
with your
glorious gifts.

Love, Andrea

Sunday, January 30, 2011

Dear God,

Where does trust come from? How is it created? How does it grow and multiply? Does trust have no limit?

I know what it is to fail to trust. I know how fear can break down trust inch by deadly inch. I know how a person can literally crawl into a fetal ball without trust of any kind.

On the other spectacular hand, I have felt trust come to life in me after long periods of little or no trust. I have felt the tickle of trust building inside me rubbing up against my insides. I have observed others taking baby steps in learning to trust after years of defensive self protection. And I have experienced my own self take a flying leap in trust believing that trust comes as a divine gift.

Where does it begin in the human soul? Is there a repository of elements that come together making conditions right for trust to be birthed? Is the possibility for trust as close as a human breath?

This weekend retreatants lived out of a living well of trust, one that by its nature said, "I am not alone; God is with me." Last night I listened as trust sang her greatest song.

Deepen our well
of living water,
O God.
Keep your ladle
close by
that we
who are thirsty
for trust
can bring
our cups
for filling.

Gratefully, Andrea

Saturday, January 29, 2011

Dearest God,

There is a spiritual kinship with fellow pilgrims on retreat. When we lift our eyes, seeking guidance, a gentle leading toward the holy and wholeness, there is a bond unlike any other. You, O Lord, make this possible.

We retreated together today and although we came from many directions in our spiritual life, at day's end we wound up at the same place, unity, singing one song. We made our way through the past recalling to mind many of those who brought you to us. We celebrated them in our lives and the many gifts they brought to us. Through them and others, we discovered our heartsong and together we sang it to you and one another. How awe-inspiring as we witnessed the work of your spirit in our midst. That which we were afraid of, an exercise we were fearful of doing became a glorious work with your handprint. Indeed we sang eternity's song.

Receive our praise,
God of Many Wonders;
accept our prayers
of thanksgiving.

Love, Andrea

Friday, January 28, 2011

Dearest God,

There are some places I simply call "home." When I drive up state road 31 N, my pulse quickens when I see in my view the stop light at Division Road in Tipton, Indiana. The green sign on the right hand side of the road says it all: St. Joseph Retreat Center. The five mile drive from the intersection is always heartwarming as I reflect upon the countless times I have met you at the catholic site. Once a private girls school, it is now home to the sisters of St. Joseph who open their doors to those in search of a deep abiding faith.

For my first ten years I grew up in Tipton. I remember the school but for some reason it looked like a scary place to me. Years later I returned to the newly renovated retreat center and I saw it through new eyes. The sisters, the facility, the saints and the residents speak a language I can understand, the language of hospitality, faith, love and growth.

I am expectant when I make the drive to Tipton. I expect to be welcomed with love. I expect to find Christ present. I expect to witness insights, revelations, spurts of growth and sometimes miracles. I am never disappointed.

I smiled as I drove into the long driveway leading to the center for I knew I was home and you were waiting for me.

Generous God,
who gives more
than you?
No one.
Who is
more loving?
No one.
Who inspires,
touches the soul
more deeply?
No one.
Thank you
for St. Joseph,
for the sisters,
benefactors, contributors
and friends.
Thank you
for faith
and places
set aside
for the sojourner.

Love, Andrea