Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Dearest God,

I followed the star, the brightest one in the sky. It led me to the monastery where my colleagues and I shared a miracle story. A story of reconciliation with one's own self, a renewal of the heart, a surrender of the old way, a liberation, all leading to a new life.

I find you waiting in one of the chairs every Wednesday morning. In the quiet sacred oasis the dimly lighted room is such a welcoming place. Peace lives here. And whether we share moments of sorrow and anguish or yet another miracle discovered, we live in this peace among sisters who live their lives in prayer.

They are making ready for Christmas. The Advent candles flickered as I read the morning scripture. The holy sacrament was to me new food. The smiles of women who have given their life to you in prayer touched my heart once again.

I lived in this monastery for eight days several years ago. It is a familiar home to me. I wandered its halls reflecting upon my life of faith, my call to ministry, my walk with your son. How I loved being there. How I loved the life of simplicity, silence and solitude. It breathed new air into my soul.

I danced in the outer chamber. With such a wide expanse, I danced and danced to the music. I ascended the stairs as if reaching for heaven. The sisters asked if they could participate as observers. I was hesitant, reluctant. Yet, these women are part of my life, have been for 20 years. They have been my prayer partners, my spiritual mentors, my friends, my support. Their spirituality and life of faith have challenged me in the deepest part of my being. They videotaped me dancing. I now reside in their archives as part of their life experience.

The star, the only star in the sky, like the one over Bethlehem leads me every week to the place where I find Jesus.

My wanderings
always lead me to you.
You are never far away.
My heart beats
for you.
And my joy
is always complete
in your presence.
Today I gazed
upon the brilliant star
and felt myself
like the shepherds
longing to find
the place of your dwelling.
Knowing my way
I was not disappointed.

Love, Andrea