Saturday, February 2, 2008

My dearest God,

I enjoy taking chaos and helping it to find calm. I find meaning in taking torment and weaving peace into it. I find joy in taking the hand of someone who anguishes and injecting hope, turning stressful cells into quiet surrender.

I have a rhythm about me. I learned that a long time ago. This rhythm can take me down, collapsing my inner soul. Or if I give myself utterly to the rhythm that is divine, sacred, one that gives life in a gentle give and take, I am quietly invigorated. My life finds balance and a joy in peaceful living.

When I reflect upon my life, the chaotic times as well as the balanced times, I can see your shadow cast over me. I can see your hand upon mine, hear your voice whispering, know the gentle love that comes to me.

This truth came to me as I took a large disorganized, cluttered kitchen pantry (not mine) and turned it into a usable, functioning, organized arrangement of staples, foodstuffs, paper products and kitchen appliances. Although it took some time, I felt the rhythm of bringing order to disorder. There should be no more stress in trying to find something.

One of my favorite scriptures is from Ecclesiastes..."a time and season for all things under heaven..." I know the season of discontent, unsettledness, and stress. But I have also known the pendulum's swing toward contentment, settledness, and peace. And I know the source of this movement is you.

Through daily ordinary activities I learn from you. The season of discernment comes to me and I see revelation. When I am trusting, courageous, I follow your direction to the peaceful place. I give up my anxious feeling and I almost instantly feel my breathing change rhythm. I know I have stood with you, followed your leading, known the result of your desire for me.

I am blessed.

Loving God,
you are not
a distant god,
far off and away.
But rather
you are with me,
just as you are
with my neighbor.
These days
I ride the pendulum
with you,
tempted often
to jump off
to the other side.
But why?
Why enter
the place
where chaos reigns?
Riding with you
brings me greater joy
than anything
in life.
You are
the God
I serve,
the God
I love.
I am blessed.

Love, Andrea