Friday, March 26, 2010

My dearest, dearest God,

Oh my gosh! My goodness! I have been on the patio washing down my patio furniture. I've been cleaning it, removing dust, dirt and debris and then setting it on the side of the patio that has already been cleaned. It was in the midst of doing this mundane activity that a vision came to me. I am certain, very certain it came from you.

I was thinking about miracles, how you raise the dead to new life. I realized that what is dead is dead; it never rises again. Flesh rots, the old bones break apart and become dust. What does come following death is a new creation. St. Paul wrote about this new creation when he wrote to the church in Corinth. "If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away." I love Eugene Peterson's translation from the Message in 2 Corinthians 5:7)

That's what got me. In my vision I saw a figure drive to a cemetery, take out a shovel and go to their own grave. The person began to dig until the shovel hit the top of the coffin. That's when the person got something heavier to break open the casket and rip off the lid. Then the person climbed into the open box attempting to lift the dead body and then cried out, "How dare you act as if you are dead!"

How positively absurd, morbid and disgusting! A dead body is dead, decaying, going back to the dust of the earth just as it is destined to do! However, what came to me was the attempt we make to go back to what is past, what is dead, what is gone and try to resurrect it, giving it energy, life and power today. Can't be done unless we lie to ourselves, try to persuade others to believe the dead still exists, give power to a nonexistent person, place, happening or thing and allow it to trigger fresh new pain and suffering! If I am in Christ and a new creation I cannot possibly return to my dead body or my dead past. It is already dust.

Everytime I return to the guilt of my past or give power to something that hurt me a long time ago and is over, finished and done, repented, grace accepted and new life begun, it is like dragging my body out of the grave and saying," Who in the hell told you you could act dead?" A new creation is a new creation. Yesterday is past and gone, never to be relived. Any time I try to go backwards to something that happened days, weeks, months and even years ago and make it as if it is real today, I am foolish, crazy, in fact, insane.

When I am tempted to return to the past instead of living fully today as a new creation, it is just like returning to the grave and being angry that the dead is acting dead. I realize when we go along with others who want the past to be the present or we ourselves want to make the past the present, we are giving in to believing that what is dead is full of life and energy. Only crazy people should believe that!

We believe that we can make the dead alive simply by talking continuously about it and trying to project on others blame, judgement and guilt. As long as we or I live to believe and act from the past then the past will be the present and past hurts will provide fresh wounds or I can simply say, "This is crazy! I love the new creation, feels good! Want to join me for a hot fudge sundae in celebration?"

O God,
how good
you are
to remind us
that the past
has no
power or energy
to destroy us.
Grace lets
the dying
finally die
and provides
the means
by which
new life
can come.
When we
dip into
the past
that grace
has erased,
we fool ourselves
and grab hold
of lifeless gods
that seek
to ruin us,
robbing us
of your
life-giving power
and grace-filled love.
Oh,
dear God,
how grateful
I am
for today's
beautiful vision!

Yours forever and ever, Andrea