Sunday, May 22, 2011

Dear God,

What do you do when you wait upon the Lord, the preacher asked. What do you do? Sitting in the front row of the choir loft, I wanted to slip away and ponder the question in prayer. But there was no way out so I allowed my mind to wander. While he offered five things to do while we wait, you brought to mind the many gifts I have received while waiting.

During my time with breast cancer, you brought me an enhanced vision of your presence. While I waited during an estrangement with my daughter, you gave me courage, strength, and faith. As our church struggled to make important decisions for the future, you blessed me with wisdom and patience. As my husband and I were separated, you provided perseverance, hope, and trust. During my times of waiting you have been a powerful force in my life.

As I walk the journey with a continuing hurt in my life, you are honing my skills of humility and obedience as I work to keep myself clear of resentment and bitterness. When I get triggered by a comment that makes a past hurt sting once again, I am conscious of the fact that I am at another crossroad where I have the choice of several responses. I know I can give resentment a chance to take root or I can give thanks for the chance to strengthen my abilities to do just the opposite and what a gift that is. I look at my husband and remember how that gift alone helped to save our marriage.

I know that right now while I wait upon you, using the same principles, trusting in your grace, relying on my faith, and keeping a pure heart toward those who have hurt me will ultimately bring healing and wholeness. Although at times it is frustrating, painful, and humbling, waiting upon you can bring extraordinary blessings.

Living and Loving God,
I sit
at your feet
waiting.
In this
prime position
you speak,
challenge,
disciple,
and stretch me.
You teach me
the secrets
of the universe
while I wait.
What more
could I
possibly want?

Love, Andrea