Saturday, December 1, 2012

Dearest God,

When I awakened from a night's sleep I thought of a dying friend.  Does he wake up to darkness, Lord?  Does fear bring darkness?  When earthly life is nearing an end, does fear of the unknown bring darkness?

During some periods of my own life when I was facing a difficult situation, I would wake up and immediately be hit by fear and darkness.  My whole body would shudder thinking of the perceived unfolding of the day that would bring only darkness to me.  But then faith would come alive like a sentry who stands up guarding the door from intruders.  Although I could not completely make the leap from fear to faith, it was enough to warrant my trust in getting up, putting one foot in front of the other, and taking the first steps of the new day.

I have come to realize how much difference faith makes in any situation.  A simple trust in you lets life-giving air flow.  You offer it to us along with the light and before long hope follows, not necessarily hope in a changed outcome but hope in a life with you that reminds us that we are not alone.  We do have built-in resources that help us come alive when we are crushed and downtrodden no matter the condition we are facing.

When I suffer from lack of faith, I give up opportunities that stand waiting at my door.  I forfeit the chance to breathe in your mercy and experience your tender care.  I am blinded by fear that blocks the way to sight so I can envision your light shining.  I give up or give in to fear that keeps me paralyzed.

But even then, O Lord, you do not leave me or any of us alone.  You come like a gentle mother whose light is bright and ever-pervasive.  You sing to us, coddling us close while your arms hold us steady.  You stay until we are ready to crawl down and walk into the next minute with you.

Gracious God,
Eternal Light of the World,
remain ever
so close
so we may
find you
in our darkness.
Help us
to grab hold
of faith
rather than fear.
Teach us
the ability
to grab
for faith
before ever
considering fear.
Remind us
what a
life with you
means for us
and those
around us.
Lead us,
O God Eternal,
we pray.

Love, Andrea