Friday, December 28, 2007

Dear God,

We were making our way to our son’s home for Christmas. We had to drive through the town where I lived with my children many years ago. We were just leaving it when all of a sudden, a reality struck me. My heart was light, my spirit peaceful, my soul content.

For the last 13 years every time I drove through this town, my heart was heavy, my spirit in chaos, my soul grievous. I realized my family members were close by. Feeling the pain of a great chasm, tears would form in my eyes. Sometimes while driving through town I would roll down the window and scream out the window. “I love you, I love you, I love you.” I would call out their names. Some way I hoped that my words would waft to their home telling them for the millionth time that my heart was full of love for each one.

This year it was dramatically different. In my own home I held each one in my arms. My hug told them of my deep affection. One day when it is right and comfortable for them I will say, “I love you” to each child, teen and adult. I’m satisfied right now that my hugs express my feelings.

Again I became aware of your marvelous movement. How you have worked to transform each heart. How you took away bitterness and pain. How you dissolved resentment. How you filled hearts with something better, richer, warmer. How you drew people together. How you made people laugh again. How you made the suffering disappear. How you chose the time when healing and renewal would take place. How you made love possible and real. How you…

People say you don’t exist. Or that you aren’t interested, don’t care. So not true. So false. So wrong. Just like a room filling with air that we can’t see, you are present and your presence has the capacity to change things. Like the air makes it possible for me to breathe, so does your presence make it possible for my heart to sing and dance.

There is nothing but love inside me. Yours.

I’m singing my praises.
Wondering again
how you make it all happen.
I’m whistling my joy.
Celebrating again
how you make it all happen.
I’m dancing my blessings,
letting them flow out of me.
Reflecting again
how you make it all happen.
I’m living my life,
full of your grace.

Love, Andrea