Wednesday, November 22, 2006

Dear God,

Thanksgiving. This will be my 60th Thanksgiving. Oh my!

I awakened early this morning...3ish. My husband stirred about 4:00 a.m. Not feeling up to par. We talked until 5:00 a.m. I prayed aloud for special friends, Ann dying of cancer, Craig entering an alcohol treatment center, Lebanon where conflicts are brewing, for Harold, family, friends, the church, the cosmos. Starting the day with prayer with the one you love most in the world is a good thing!

But as I started downstairs to write, I was inundated with Thanksgivings past. Thanksgiving dinner with all the trimmings and much much more down on the farm at Grandma's house. Thanksgiving serving the hungry, listening to their stories as my children spent the day with their father who lived in another city. (Got into trouble with the senior pastor who told me to just serve the people, not talk with them) Thanksgiving dinner with my parents and siblings on a snowy, wintry day. Thanksgiving serving a meal to the homeless in Indianapolis. Thanksgiving when I cooked my first Turkey (didn't know it had strange stuff inside until I cut into it). Thanksgiving at Harold's son's home where I had a severe allergic reaction and was rushed to the hospital. (Spent the day looped up on Benadryl because I drank about half a bottle to avoid suffocating before I went to the hospital) Thanksgiving with all our family. Thanksgiving when my husband lost his temper and stabbed the turkey. (It was already dead) Thanksgiving when we returned home to find that Bailey, our beloved dog, had enjoyed a special Thanksgiving meal by knocking the turkey to the floor and eating a large portion of it as well as about 3 lbs of chocolate fudge. (Spent the rest of the day cleaning messes all over the house) Thanksgiving at my daughter's home in Michigan. Thanksgiving.

Mostly I don't think about the pilgrims and Indians who spent the first Thanksgiving together. I should. But I do think of giving thanks for blessings that are mine. I always honor the day, remembering all my gifts. And I've received many of them. I never move on to Christmas without first celebrating Thanksgiving. In fact I hope Thanksgiving gives me some perspective before I move on to the gift giving and receiving in December.

I'll be with my children tomorrow. Harold will be with his. We will miss each other. This year I want to savor the moments of Thanksgiving because I plan to do some special things with two of my older granddaughters. I intend to read a Christmas story each night before we snuggle into our sleeping bags on the floor. I'm prepared to guide them in making very special gifts for their family. I hope to take them to a movie. I will pray with them. I will make memories, long to be remembered as they grow older and so do I.

I'm looking forward to this season of thanks for I have much for which to be thankful. I realize that I don't have as many Thanksgivings to celebrate in my future as I have in the past, all the more reason to enjoy what is before me. I pray that I will rise early, write my letter to you, walk alone in the cold, breezy winds of Michigan, and reflect upon God's grace, that unconditional love that never stops even when my behavior tempts it to. I am blessed.

God of Thanksgiving,
I open my heart to you.
My soul gives thanks,
remembers the constancy,
the faithfulness
of your son Jesus.
I recall the past,
days with family,
days alone,
sad, happy, perplexed,
a myriad of emotions
dependent on "where" I was
at that moment in my life.
Although I was "all over the place"
you were always in the same place,
beside me,
sharing in my joy
or my dilemma.
Thanksgiving,
the blessing of God.

Love to you, Andrea