Sunday, November 11, 2007

Dearest God,

Will fear ever be eradicated? Dissolved forever and ever? And what keeps it alive anyway?
It seems I always have to face my fears again and again. Each time I travel, thinking about climbing into the sky brings a modicum of fear for me. I don't let it stop me from doing what I feel called to do. But I don't like it.

My fears seem to be held at bay and even now they are fairly in check but I know they are there waiting to pop up their ugly heads. Getting ready, going to the airport, getting on board, taxiing, then revving the engines, rising into the sky, then coming back down. I go wherever I need to go because I felt lead to go and it is my only mode of transportation. Yet, just under my skin these little nagging fears scratch at me.

Will I ever fully trust you with my fears? Will I ever totally let go, surrender into your arms? Will I ever be free of fears that can paralyze? I don't want to enter heaven with any fears, any obstacles between us. Yet, I battle again and again.

Dear God, be in my fear. Be the good news for every cell that falls prey to fear. Be the light in the darkness. Be the beat of my heart that rushes too fast with fear. Be my breath that breathes with assurance, love, trust, and grace. Help me stand fast with you, with you, Lord.

You are the God
of my faith.
You are the God
of my heart.
You are the God
in my soul.
There is no other.
I place my trust
in you,
again
and
again
and
again.

Love, Andrea