Sunday, October 5, 2008

Dear God,

I looked out among my flock this morning. As we sang, I remembered their stories of struggle, pain, sorrow, loss, disappointment, hurt. I recalled the conquerings, the movement of faith, the yes to surrender, the courage and strength that came directly from your heart and hand. I saw your word of hope for many, how they have trusted and risen up to follow you, sometimes in very painful ways. Their singing reminded me that we can move through pain to victory.

And then I saw those whose struggle is not over. A cancer patient, one who recently lost everything, a trying marriage, one who fears for her children, another whose health is a trial, and one who has lost a friend. I wonder if you are big enough to help each one. But the prayers, the Word, the lyrics to the songs, and the spirit itself tells me you are always big enough and I smile back, raising my eyes to the heavens singing out your praise.

The months of my ministry are numbered now. As each month goes by, there is one less month to serve your church. And I realize how blessed I am even for the sufferings I have faced and continue to share with your beloved ones.

And so at day's end, I see their faces and give thanks.

Most Loving God,
I hold on
to each blessing.
The golden thread
of your love
has connected me
to your beloved.
In some cases
the threads
are worn, frayed,
yet have held strong.
There are others
that have felt
the knife's cut,
the rip,
the tear,
the loss.
I must
let go,
allowing the threads
to take hold
where they will
and celebrate
the seasons
of your grace
and compassion.
I am yours,
my Beloved,
I am yours.
Hold on
to my thread
into eternity,
I pray.

Love, Andrea