Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Dear God,

Epiphany. The festival day celebrated in commemoration of the wise men who brought gifts to the infant Jesus. Gifts brought to you. Do you remember them? Do you know why they brought them or why they hung around to worship? What made them desire to give a gift to this unknown child? How could they be sure he was the one?

When I asked a question in a recent sermon, "What gift will you give to God this year?", I thought about my own gifts. What came to me is courage. I will give courage to you this year and faith. When I thought about it later, I wondered if a weak courage and faith was really much of a gift. Then I wondered if I wanted to give those to you as a way of building them up, a return gift to me.

What gift can I really give you? What counts in your book? What can I offer without strings? My prayers of late have been simple pleading prayers. Not much of a gift. The truth is I haven't had much to offer lately. My mind, heart and spirit feel very vulnerable at the moment and I am trying hard to stay above water by trusting you to guide me. Perhaps that bit of trust is my only gift at the moment.

I hold on
to you,
dear God,
like a child
holds its mother
in the dark.
Your arms
around me
give me cause
to trust
and be comforted.
You alone
are worthy
of my praise
and thanksgiving.
Thank you,
Abba Daddy.

Love, Andy