Tuesday, July 30, 2013

Dear God,

The pilgrim journey of faith is one of accountability.  If I truly want to give my life to an ever-deepening relationship to you, then I need to give an account of my thoughts, decisions, and actions. This morning that really came home to me.

For some reason maybe because I am tired, maybe because I have high expectations for myself, sometimes unreasonably high, maybe because I feel taken advantage of, or I am just being cranky and unforgiving, doesn't matter really, I muttered complaints.  Oh my, so many complaints!  At the same time I hummed a tune of a song we sang at church on Sunday.  Be Still and Know that I am God kept rolling around in my head.  Then I started singing the words all the while I complained.  All of a sudden on my knees while I mopped the bathroom floor, I realized my careless behavior.  What in the world???  Singing a song of faith and muttering judgement against others, I mean...really!  The two are not compatible in any way.  I realized you had me circle around to the truth of my self.

The longer I live, the more I desire to follow you, the more I realize you constantly stay in touch with us.  You speak and expect we will get the point.  We will see both the error of our ways and your loving hand upon us.  On my knees in prayer, perhaps even a lament I saw myself and was glad you would meet me in faith.

Thank you,
O Lord,
for allowing
your spirit
to quicken
my awareness.
Thank you
for pointing me
to the truth
that really does
set us free.
Thank you
for grace
that cleanses,
refreshes,
and replenishes
our faith.
I am sorry;
please forgive me.

Love, Andrea