Thursday, November 15, 2007

Dear God,

I felt compelled to write this letter.

Dear Mother Teresa,

I just finished reading your book (or rather the book written about you) entitled, "Mother Teresa Come Be My Light (The Private Writings of the Saint of Calcutta). You would have been terribly distressed that your private thoughts, your letters to your confessors and spiritual mentors were published. Especially because you asked many times that all your letters be destroyed. And why? Because you were so afraid that they would bring attention to you rather than to Jesus. Almost all your letters were preserved and shared with an admiring public. However, I think it was God's will that they were kept and offered to all who would read them.

I was so sad to learn about your spiritual torment for 55 long suffering years. It is hard to conceive that one who loved Jesus so much, who wanted to love him more than anyone had ever loved him would feel such loss, such distance, such rejection and abandonment from your Beloved Spouse. I wept for your sorrow.

It is true that the book is written about you. But it is much more than that. The book is about faith and love during life's greatest struggle. You were true to your vow made on September 10, 1946 to "never refuse Jesus anything." When he asked you to come be his light, you became his light to the poorest of the poor and to those of us who have much more than we deserve, we observed your goodness as the light to the least, the last, the lost and forgotten. We admired your work, your ministry greatly.

As I read of your deepest darkness of the soul, I could understand. I too have known darkness but I am ashamed as I think of your years of darkness. Why I do not know or understand, in my time of darkness Jesus came to me, giving me hope. My faith grew out of that hope. I had witnessed the Living Lord because he had aided me in climbing out of my dark holes. I gave him, give him praise for such a gift. Since then I have tried with my heart to carry his light to others.

But you, you carried light when you had none to carry. And precisely because you carried it, others saw the light through you for 55 years. You couldn't see its glow inside yourself but the world saw it. I saw it. Be assured, great sister of faith that your writings will be the light that leads us to Jesus.

Rest easy now in the arms of your Beloved. The light continues to shine ever more brilliantly.

Love and blessings on your total union with Jesus, Andrea Leininger

Loving God,
I do not begin
to understand
the depth
of the pain and suffering
of one
of your great self-giving children.
To have loved the world
while carrying your light
to others
as she lived
in total darkness
is beyond my ability
to understand.
Yet, never perhaps
has there been one
who has lived faith so richly
given so much
of your love away
or brought souls
to you.
Never has there been one
who so clearly
associated herself
with your own suffering
and the suffering
of your children.
Hers was the life
of darkness
and suffering
like those
she served.
Oh God,
through these writings
may others know
the light
and be willing
to carry it to others.
May the great sacrifice
of "your little one"
bring the world
to the Light.

Love, Andrea